THE REST OF THE STORY

by Denny Jackson

    Ya know, each year we hear the promotions and hype about the, "Wonderful Doane Experience"' and that we need to be there.

    Okay, I bought into it, and enrolled again for a second year.  I even convinced my wife that she needed to be there, even though she is not a woodcarver, she could participate in the one-a-day projects.  We faithfully sent in our money and anxiously anticipated the "Doane Experience".  The months came and went February, March, April, May, June, and then just when our excitement was waning a little, our letters from our instructors started arriving at our house.  July was here!  Only a little over three weeks to go.  We went on faith and purchased supplies for our classes and put them in special places ready to load in the car.

    Then, July 29th arrived and we were on our way, filled with both anticipation and a little anxiety, not sure we would be up to the challenge of our classes.

    Okay, enough of the buildup, I'm here to tell you that all of the promotions and hype about the "Doane Experience" are true.  313 happy carvers from 28 states can't be wrong.  The accommodations are dorm style so we had a little deja vu.  I assured my wife that it was not only a college rule, but a Doane rule, that Freshman, or in this case a rookie, always get the top bunk.  Heh!  Heh!

    We soon discovered that our classes were awesome, our instructors were the greatest, the people were the friendliest, and there was enough food to feed ten armies.  A carver's heaven.  I'm so glad my best friend was there to share it with me.

    I had opted to take Linda Langenberg Curtis' class on Grizzly Bear busts.  Each day I would stare at that bear and bring him to life little by little with much guidance from Linda, of course.  Three days of full time carving, probably ten hours of wood burning and a half day of painting later, I was done.  I couldn't wait to show him off at Show & Tell.  I even bought a second roughout of "the Griz" to do at home.

    Oh!! A slight interjection.  Our nights after carving were spent playing "Farkle".  Now, I soon learned that this was not a bodily function, but a crazy dice game played by our illustrious board members as an excuse to gorge on snacks and become a little crazy without their kids seeing them.  Such fun and silliness!!

    Anyway, back to the point of the story.  That is, if I haven't forgotten where I'm going with all of this.  Oh, yeah!  "The Doane Experience".

    Friday rolled around, we said our goodbyes and headed home with our creations.  The bear, of course, having the passenger seat where an air bag and seat belt would protect him from danger on the way home, while my wife was relegated to the back seat.  Oh, c'mon now!  You know that's not true, but it makes the story better.  After staring that bear in the face all week, it seemed like it had become a member of the family.

    As soon as I got home, I began working on my second bear and as Paul Harvey always says, "and now the rest of the story."

    Now I don't know if this has ever happened to anyone else, if I'm the first, or even if it will happen again, but I've had a "Doane 'Post' Experience".

    I've heard that kids have dreams and parents have nightmares.  I don't know if it was all that food at Doane, the fact that Kirt Curtis was going to Alaska, the close proximity of my bear carving, or watching the nuts who played Farkle, but I did, I really did have a nightmare.  Here's how it unfolds, you'll enjoy this.

    My wife and I and an unidentified third person, I never did see his face, a male, were driving down a back road somewhere in Alaska.  The road came to a dead end at a bog field and, of course, our car got stuck.  We were forced to walk.  Oh my!!  My wife and I and that third guy had just reached the bottom of a hill and had started ascending another, when I looked back and noticed a giant, that means "really" big, grizzly bear heading across the other hill.  He hadn't noticed us yet, so I said let's get outa here and we started running up the hill.  Of course, I know not to run, but this is my nightmare and that's what we did.  Of course, the grizzly now sees us and is chasing us.  I know I could have out run Jesse Owens at that time, cuz I was really motating.  Yup, so was the bear.  I could feel his breath on the back of my neck, when there out of no where appeared a log cabin.  Maybe I had watched "Jeremiah Johnson" one too many times, I don't know, but my fleetness put me behind the door of the cabin just in the nick of time.  What I couldn't figure out was how my wife and that other guy had gotten there before me.  Man, they had to be flying.  Just as the door slammed behind me, and I found my wife and that other guy were safe.  I woke up.